Blog Posts by Angel Cohn

You've got to hand it to The CW: It knows how to keep an upfront moving. From kicking it off with a performance by Flo Rida to just jumping right to a preview of its most interesting new series, "Arrow," it flew by faster than any other network presentation this week. Sure, it spent time discussing social media and whatnot, but it was all broken up by onstage appearances by the very beautiful people who are on the shows. And hey, most of the upcoming shows look watchable, if not legitimately entertaining, and since they're recycling a ton of their talent (and in some cases, characters), we feel like we know these programs already.

'Arrow' (Wednesdays at 8 PM)
It's a show about the DC Comics hero Green Arrow, but it doesn't star the "Smallville" Green Arrow, Justin Hartley (he has another CW gig), nor does it refer to him as "Green." This Oliver Queen comes in the chiseled form of Stephen Amell, who plays a young billionaire who was presumed dead

CBS poobah Les Moonves got us all excited about a one-minute-long upfront at the beginning of the network's presentation this afternoon, but it actually went on for over an hour. And considering the network only has four new shows this fall, that meant a lot of padding.

[Photos: CBS' New 2012-2013 Shows]

So they filled the time with "Mike & Molly" stars Billy Gardell and Melissa McCarthy bantering about their recent fake wedding and the lack of gifts they've received from their fellow CBS stars (except Ted Danson, who sent them a pony); the "Two Broke Girls" trying to find a way to make money; LL Cool J rapping; and Eli Manning trying to crack jokes (which, as we learned on "Saturday Night Live," is not something he can do). Still, despite the fact that this was the network that showed us the fewest clips, the ones we saw actually had more promise than the other three this week so far.

[Photos: CBS's Upfronts in NYC]

Comedy

Partners (Mondays at 8:30 PM)
This comedy didn't exactly

"Nashville" (NBC)We're still trying to figure out what ABC's execs were talking about at their upfront presentation when they claimed they were the "number one must-keep" network, but at least they had something resembling a sense of humor about their shows, talking about while their Bachelors may not stay engaged, they're viewers are. And then, as usual, they unleashed Jimmy Kimmel, whose show has been on the air for ten years, which is about nine longer than I predicted way back when. He joked to the ad buyers in the crowd that "We don't know what we are doing. We have no idea what people want to see. If we did, we wouldn't have an upfront; we'd just put the shows on the air and you'd just mail us a check." Then he added, "That show "Work It"... you know we were just kidding about that, right?" Of course, he had to rip on the other networks as well. On NBC: "Spinning chairs and a monkey. This truly is a golden age of television." On Fox's "X Factor": "No one knows talent like Britney Spears and Demi

The Fox up-front presentation began with a pretaped bit about the cast of "New Girl" interviewing for a new roommate, and their options were Fox stars ranging from Mr. Schue to Walter to the kid from "Touch." Oh, and Emily Deschanel, because they couldn't resist making a sister joke. It was cute and the highlight of the network's hourlong presentation, for sure. Most of the rest focused on clips from this season of "New Girl," a live awkward bit of banter between Zooey Deschanel and Mindy Kaling about who is the most adorkable Fox star of them all, and Ryan Seacrest being Ryan Seacresty. They also made a big deal about "The X Factor" and officially introduced new judges Demi Lovato and Britney Spears, while making a couple of digs at "The Voice." I suppose they had to fill the time somehow, because aside from talking about some new random animation domination HD thing that's going to air in the dead of Saturday night (11pm-12:30am) and referencing baseball as much as

This morning at Radio City Music Hall, NBC unveiled its new fall lineup with the help of a lot (a lot) of singing. Those of us in attendance were treated to a performance by "Voice" winner Jermaine Paul, a full gospel choir and orchestra backing "Smash" stars Leslie Odom Jr. and Katherine McPhee on "Stand" to close the presentation, and, to open things up, McPhee and Megan Hilty doing "Let Me Be Your Star," complete with a bit of "The Voice" judges (sans Blake Shelton) spinning their chairs for them. And then, in a pre-packaged bit, Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon "found" footage of the returning shows infused with music (including "The Office," "Parks and Recreation," "Law & Order: SVU," "Meet the Press," and, most amusingly, "Grimm").

  [Photos: See the New Comedies and Dramas Joining the NBC Lineup]

 Honestly, while NBC exec Bob Greenblatt joked that a "Grimm" musical episode was a long way from a reality, it might get me to start watching that show again. The network's execs promised

"Once Upon a Time" has made it its business to offer up modern takes on classic fairytale characters (or at least the Disney-fied versions most people are familiar with). We look back at the first season to see who they did right, and who they got really wrong.

Best: Rumpelstiltskin
He's mischievous and devious, which is perfect, and in the Enchanted Forest he can always strike a devilish deal with consequences. He also had a complicated relationship with his son Baelfire and fell in love with Belle, but thought that she was a spy, so he screwed things up and now thinks she's dead. It hasn't been all easy for the dark one with magical powers. Plus, he just gives us the creeps when he appears out of the shadows.

Worst: Pinocchio
He's a selfish brat, essentially. Geppetto carved him out of an enchanted tree and puppet Pinocchio was only given the gift of life because he saved his "father" from drowning. But that was his last selfless act, as when he's told to take care of baby Emma

Just in time for Mother's Day... a week when children disappointed their parents in so many ways.

Caroline ("Real Housewives of New Jersey")
Caroline likes to make her daughter, Lauren, feel like crap about herself because she isn't skinny like her brothers. And telling her that she'd have fat children -- and that if she loses weight, she can be successful in life -- is just bitchy. Not only did Caroline attack her daughter for being heavy, but she also didn't stop her husband or kids from picking on Lauren mercilessly while she was attempting to diet. We hope Lauren doesn't get her a good Mother's Day present.

Vicki ("Real Housewives of Orange County")
Speaking of "RH" moms who don't deserve gifts this weekend, may we also present Vicki, who was devastated when her daughter (who is in her 20s) decided to elope with the guy she's been dating for two years. She was mortified by this decision and ashamed to tell her friends. Oh, did we mention that Brianna had survived a major cancer

Another season filled with jaw-dropping twists that had us desperately anticipating the next episode. Cliffhangers are really what "The Vampire Diaries" does best, but there were also plenty of other thrilling moments, as well as a few things that may have brought some tears to our eyes.

News to Us
Not that we ever really wanted Damon and Andie to have a long-term relationship, but the newscaster was an entertaining little sex toy for him, with a feisty personality. So Stefan's compelling her to jump to her own death was twisted even by his inhuman standards.

Let's Talk About Sex
When Carol Lockwood discovered that Caroline was actually a vampire, she shot her with some vervain darts in the back. And it was only moments after our favorite blond vamp had gotten her sexy on with Tyler. That's a slight overreaction to hating your son's new girlfriend.

I'd Rather Be Dead
Caroline's dad (played by TWoP fave Jack Coleman) hated vampires with a passion, and tried to force the