Blog Posts by Nikki Boyer

“Today”: Dule Hill tried to teach Hoda how to tap dance today. Emphasis on tried. Because that’s all that happened.

“Live!”: Everyone was making fun of Michael for finishing last in his high school class (of two students) but nobody asked Kelly how she did in high school! Maybe it’s the same kind of etiquette rule as “never as a woman her age?” Hmm… never ask a woman her grades? I’m all for it!

“Anderson”: Anderson was completely busted when Snooki realized that he doesn't watch her show! But I mean jeez Anderson, is doing things like traveling to Rome to cover the new Pope and hosting two shows a day too much for you that you can't watch "Snooki and JWoww" on a regular basis?! Sounds to me like you need to get your priorities in order mister!

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“Today”: At first I thought the fourth hour had sunk to a new low by introducing a kiss cam. But it was just a shot of Lisa Rinna! She claims that she had her trademark pontoons shrunk down by a doctor two years ago, but they still looked pretty big on TV... and from space! I'd like to see that doctor's diploma, because I'm not so sure she's a collagen graduate!

“GMA”: George Stephanopoulos took another Monday off. Man, he has a sweet gig! It's a news show, so they always say he's "on assignment", but I have a feeling it involves interviewing the inside of his eyelids while he sleeps in. I wouldn't mind that kind of assignment. I'm even totally willing to work undercover, as long as it means staying under my covers.

“Access Hollywood Live”: How crazy is it that they had a bear on the show?! They also had a bearcat on the show and contrary to Billy's belief, it is not the product of a bear and cat mating together. But I'm sure glad Billy's fourth-grade theory made it's way out in the

“Today”: You might think it's disrespectful for someone to give a former President bunny ears, but considering what normally goes on in a guys locker room, I think he got off easy! Can you imagine if today's headline was that President Clinton got an atomic wedgie in the Louisville locker room? Or what if they gave him a swirlie?!

“AHL”: The discussion Billy and Kit had about what Billy was wearing under his kilt was probably something I could have gone without! Lets just say it's going to take a lot of green beer for me to forget the thoughts that popped in my head during that conversation!

“Live!”: Ryan Reynolds just finished his reign as Sexiest Man Alive, and Michael Strahan made the middle o' the magazine as a runner-up for this year's SMA. It's just a matter of time, people. So that made Kelly Ripa the accidental center of a Sexist Man Alive sandwich! A Sexiest Man-wich, if you will. It's sort of the opposite of the poor guy at 30 Rock who has to squeeze in between Hoda and KLG

“The View”: TIL (today I learned) that Lucy Liu has spent years with a whole other second secret career, as a watercolor painter! For ages, she used the pseudonym "Yu Ling" so that reviewers wouldn't judge her work as "paintings by actress Lucy Liu". But then nobody paid any attention to them, I guess, so suddenly, it was all, "Hey look! Paintings by actresss Lucy Liu!" They're actually pretty great. And now she's put out a book of her work to benefit UNICEF. So keep an eye out for it soon in a gallery near Yu!

“Today”: Happy Pi day! After “Today” reminded me what day it is (by having Gerard Butler do a blind pie taste test, for some reason), I've decided I'll enjoying 3.14 slices of my favorite pie (coconut cream), to mark the occasion. And that pie is divisible by nobody, you got me? They're mine all mine, until my diameter increases by the coefficient of what I put into my pi hole. Mmm, math.

“Live!”: This isn't the only show that tried Sex Cereal today, and they're also not the

“CBS This Morning”: Good thing they picked a new Pope! They've already done everything they can think of with their anchors in Rome! Charlie Rose hit the town on a Vespa, Norah scoped out all the top Gelato in town... do we have to send Gayle King over there to find the best Pasta Carbonara by the Coliseum? Because that's the kind of sacrifice a journalist like Gayle is prepared to make. Just be sure to tell her "carbonara" means "no carbs". Hey, it might work...

“GDNY”: It was really nice of Greg to apologize to the guest chef they had on for turning his cooking segment into a water fight! But I think the chef should have been the one apologizing, it was his water bottle that started the war but then he wanted nothing to do with it. I mean come on guy, if there's a water fight happening you gotta get in on that!

“Today”: If I had to sum up the dog-centric fourth hour with Kathie Lee and Hoda today I’d have to say, “rebarkable”! (C’mon, you knew it was coming!)

“Live!”: Wow, hearing

“GDNY”: With Greg Kelly you never quite know what's planned and what's a complete accident. And even while the look on his face at times made me think he purposely left the lid barely screwed on, I think the outcome was definitely more severe than he expected! I just hope he doesn't have to pay for damages because in the few years I've been watching this show, I've seen Greg destroy at least five computers and bunch of Rosanna's dresses!

“Today”: Snooki lost 42 pounds, but apparently some of those pounds she wants back in a very strategic way. She said she wants her boobs back and that motherhood as made her “floppy”. I’d say TMI, but this is Snooki we’re talking about!

“Live!”: Sure, Josh Charles was technically appearing on today's “Live” to talk about being on "The Good Wife". And he's probably still pretty well known for playing a fake anchorman on "Sports Night". But I really wish Kelly had asked him more "Dead Poets Society" questions, because to me, Josh will always be poor,

“Today”: David Copperfield is a magician! I know you probably know that, but the trick he pulled off today making Savannah’s ring disappear really proved it! Seriously, it was so engaging!

“The View”: So let me get this straight, Joy is leaving and Elisabeth is staying? What about the reports that Barbara is leaving? What about that thing I read about Whoopi being an alien? I demand that every rumor printed about the ladies is addressed so I can keep track of what's really going on! Sorry Sherri, nobody really says much about you. But that's probably a good thing at this point!

“Ellen”: Jessica Alba showed how to live a more healthy lifestyle, which included making us one of her famously nutritious "green drinks". Uh, Jess, quick question: does blending a bunch of healthy green things together include ingredients that we may or may not have put in our fridge, say, three weeks ago, that may have started out as other colors, but have turned green more recently? Because if so, my fridge

“Today”: The video of a giant wave spoiling a proposal is all fun and good, until the girl realizes that it all happened just a little too perfectly to be an accident! I mean think about it, the person filming it was in the exact right place to capture the whole wave, and the couple was standing out on the perfect rock for the wave to have the biggest impact. Something seems fishy here, I don't mean the smell of the ocean!

“Ellen”: Wait a sec! The day after an adorable 4-year-old kid singer belts out his favorite Bruno Mars song on her show, Ellen sends him home on a flight to Texas that just HAPPENS to have Bruno Mars on the same plane, so they can meet for a photo op? What are the odds? Unless, of course, Bruno Mars is also secretly a federal air marshal. Wow, that guy really is multi-talented.

“GMA”: Just about every morning show on TV had that great viral video footage of the couple whose beachfront proposal got washed away by a giant wave, just when the groom to be got down on one