“The Today Show”: There was a new inventions segment on today's show that promised to show us "accessories to help find your keys, and stop snoring". I thought I had both of those problems, but it turns out, my keys were just up my nose! Thanks guys!
“Ellen”: Nicole Kidman has a great sense of timing, like any top-shelf actress. She's especially good at the long pause. As in, when Ellen asked her about playing Grace Kelly, Nicole batted her eyelashes and said "well I think I look NOTHING like her.." aaaand, cue the long pause. Long enough for the director to put up a split screen of the two of them, and long enough for the audience and Ellen to all do "What? Of course you look like her! That's ridiculous!" Well played, Nicole. Well.... played.
“Access Hollywood Live”: Baseball legend Pete Rose was on the show and we learned that his soon-to-be step daughter thought he used to play for the Redskins, not the Reds. I'm told this is funny, but of course you would have to know what either of those teams are! Apparently the Redskins play in Washington. So does that mean they get rained on a lot? Are they big in-state rivals with the Seattle Seahawks? Why are my co-workers laughing at me?!
“Good Day LA”: I can't believe it's been a whole year since Lauren Sivan brightened our lives with her epic fail in the giant plastic ball! Since then they've made jokes on this show about how she really wants to be a serious reporter and cover breaking news. Well what a difference a year makes, or should I say doesn't make? Because she's right back in the ball again!
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