Conan Discovers Local News Anchors Following the Same Script on His Show’s ‘Envelope-Pushing’ Wedding

As you're probably aware, tonight Conan O'Brien, on the last night of his week of New York shows, will officiate at the wedding of his longtime costume designer and the designer's partner, which will be broadcast on "Conan." Conan (or, more likely, his staff) noticed something funny about how this news is being delivered locally throughout the country. Namely, it's with the exact verbatim phrase:

It's actually pretty amazing...and highly suspicious. Check out how many stations used this exact phrase:

It's interesting that the show chose to pixelate the stations' affiliations. Originally, my theory was that they were affiliates of the same network, and that the network was providing them with scripts, but you can clearly see that some are Fox and some are CBS, etc, if you look hard enough. So my guess is as good as anyone's: Is there an entity out there writing scripts for local news stations to buy? And if so, that's a little bit scary!