The Day the Franchise Died
Updated 2005-02-03 16:00:00
A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
How that music used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had my choice
That I'd rip clean that horrid voice
And maybe we'd be happy for a while.
But Russell Watson made me shiver
With every recap I'd deliver.
Bad sounds on my TiVo;
I sorta wished for Devo.
I can't remember if I cried
When I read about the ears he fried,
But something touched me deep inside
The day the franchise died.
So bye-bye, Mr. Star Trek Guy
Drove the series to the Furies,
But the Furies were wry.
And that good old Keck was drinking 'tinis so dry
Vowing, this'll be the way that I die.
This'll be the way that I die.
Did you read the book of tech,
And do you believe this utter dreck,
If Bermaga tell you so?
Do you believe in reversing pole
Can a phaser save your Trekkie soul,
And can you teach me how to mind-meld real slow?
Well, I know that you're in love with Trip
'Cause I saw you squeein' like a drip.
You both dug into pie.
Man, you dig that drawlin' blond guy.
I was a rabid teenage science geek
With an action figure and some Klingon-speake,
But I knew I was not a freak
The day the franchise died.
I started singin'
Bye-bye, Mr. Star Trek Guy
Drove the series to the Furies,
But the Furies were wry.
And that good old Keck was drinking 'tinis so dry
Vowing, this'll be the way that I die.
This'll be the way that I die.