"Today": Hoda and Kathie Lee had what can only be described as the most important segment in "Today" show history this morning, especially if you are a woman living on the West Coast or in the Sun Belt states. What magical, divine, and informative piece could this have been? "How to Tie a Winter Scarf," of course! I might sound a little sarcastic, but walk around Los Angeles on any given 80-degree day and you'll see there's a disturbing epidemic hitting ladies in their late-teens and early-20s: Chilly Neck Syndrome. You've probably seen a girl afflicted with this terrible disorder - tank top, miniskirt, sunglasses, and winter scarf! Often this crippling affliction goes hand-in-foot with Frozen Foot Illness: Women like Jessica Simpson and Pam Anderson can only survive in hot weather wearing their knee-high Ugg boots!
"The Early Show": "The Early Show" continued its weeklong segment about cooking with allergies, this time tackling lactose intolerance. What I couldn't get over is that they named it "Don't Have a Cow"! I can't wait to see what they call the one dedicated to crustaceans - "Don't be Selfish Over Serving Shellfish"?
"Martha": Martha had a "Mad" woman, Christina Hendricks, on her show to make some drinks and snacks for your Halloween party. Nothing says spooky like a blue-cheese cracker ... shaped like a bat! That is so much more clever than the Ritz crackers I crush up and call graveyard dirt. That Martha can do anything!
"Ellen": It was an exciting battle of recurring segments on the show today: "Hidden Audience Talents" vs. "Yard Sale Away With Me." And I gotta say, the yard sale finds beat the pants off the audience. OK, sure, the lady who could whinny like a horse was amazing ... but her chicken and monkey? Nothing special at all. The best they could muster after that was a guy who could stick his earlobes in his ears and pop them out again. And a lady who could climb a rope? Come on, people! It's gonna take a lot more than that to challenge yard sale gems like the "Dancin' Grannies" '80s workout video, the sponge marked "Bath Massage Thing," or the Silhouetted-Couple-Kissing-at-Sunset Toilet Seat Cover! Hopefully, someone has the hidden talent of finding audience members with better talents? (There have GOT to be some Dancin' Grannies in that crowd ...)
"GMA": I was amazed to learn that not only did Anne Rice actually move away from her native New Orleans about a month before Hurricane Katrina (settling in Palm Springs, CA) but that she hasn't been back since! Not even once. Anne says that watching the destruction of her beloved Big Easy "hurt too much," and that "it's still in my heart, every day." But a homecoming is in the works ... plans are in motion to get Anne back to the French Quarter - LeStat!
"The View": Whoopi kicked the show off with an anecdote about watching the movie "The Exorcist" last night. She described the viewing as a "huge mistake" as it kept her up the remainder of the evening. She also said the only reason she watched the movie in the first place was because she was "so comfortable in the bed I didn't want to get up and get the channel changer." I know how she feels - I couldn't sleep after watching the last four Eddie Murphy movies. "Meet Dave" still gives me nightmares!
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