Hell hath no fury like a mom scorned!
Monday night on "The Bachelorette," Emily Maynard flipped out on a trash talking suitor. Who was it, and what caused this ladylike Southern belle to go West Virginia backwoods on him?
The setting was London, and Emily had good times with Sean on a romantic one-on-one date at the Tower of London.
"London's calling, and I'm gonna answer!" he declared. He didn't even get scared off when Emily made it clear that she wants her 6-year-old daughter, Ricki, to have siblings close to her age. This prisoner of love, with his good guy swagger and impeccable abs, easily got a rose.
Ditto for Jef, who got some alone time afternoon tea with Em, a kiss, and that all-important magnetic safety rose.
It was during the Shakespeare-themed group date that things went sour.
Ryan, John, Doug, Kalon, Chris, Alejandro, Travis, and Arie had to rehearse a scene from "Romeo and Juliet." (Suffice it to say these guys are not actors.) Some of the guys had to dress as nurses, although Doug looked more like "The Flying Nun." Kalon, who landed the romantic lead, shooed Emily away while he was rehearsing. And Arie delivered the most poetic line of the day when he said, "If Shakespeare were alive today and saw Ryan, he would say 'Thouest suck.'"
Later, during a pow wow with the guys, Kalon referred to Emily as an "exhausted, sick mother." Indeed, she was fighting off a cold, and her voice was nearly gone. But it was his next sentence -- after Jef complained about being a part of too many group dates -- that got the Helicopter Guy into hot water.
"You've gotta realize that if you become a part of her life, pretty much any date is going to be a group date -- it'll be you, her, and Ricki," he cackled. And then he called little Ricki "baggage." And no, he was not about to apologize or retract it.
A few of the guys were up in arms over Kalon's comments. But Doug, who's a father himself, decided to take action and tattle.
Emily was not happy when Doug gave her the news that one of her suitors was talking smack about little Ricki.
"I want to go out there and rip his limbs off and beat him with them," she hissed.
That's not all.
"I want to go West Virginia hood rat backwoods on his ass," she added, which sounded especially menacing with her raspy, hoarse voice.
Emily's confrontation with Kalon had him trying to back peddle and say his words were taken out of context, but Emily told him to talk to the hand.
"I love to hear you talk, but not until I'm done," she said, feeding him a line that she learned from him. But the only thing that would have gotten him out of this mess was to say that he had never called Ricki "baggage."
When he admitted he had said it, Emily reminded him that having a child is "not baggage, it' a blessing." Then she kicked him to the curb in one fell swoop.
"Get the f--- out!" she ordered.
Kalon's exit was not tear-filled. "I was dreaming my first child would be a child of my own," he explained. As for the baggage comment, he added, "I did say it, and I did absolutely mean it."
But Emily's vengeance didn't end there. She was furious at the other guys for not having her back. In the end she eliminated Alejandro at the rose ceremony, but it could have been anybody.
Later, the Southern belle even questioned her own judgment."How could I let someone that terrible slip through the cracks?" she asked.
Meanwhile, a savvy Jef used the incident as a way to score some points with the Emily, saying, "If Ricki's baggage, she's a Chloe handbag that I want to have forever." (Correction, Jef, she's a vintage Louis Vuitton -- at least according to her mom!)
Next week: It's off to Croatia -- with a lot less baggage!
The next episode of "The Bachelorette" airs on Monday night at 8/7c on ABC.
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