Should the United States get involved in the war in Syria? Not so fast – we still need to figure out who won the Iraq War. Fortunately, Jon Stewart is here to help us make sense of it.
Unfortunately, per the New York Times and Tuesday's "Daily Show," the biggest winner of the war in Iraq is actually...China.
"Don't you have to be in a war to win it?" quipped Stewart.
He continued, "They've already beaten us in synchronized drumming, bear cuteness, air chewability – and you gotta take this from us too?"
You see, China is the leading buyer of Iraq oil, purchasing half of the country's output.
How, you may or may not be asking? China has spent over $2 billion and sent hundreds of workers in Iraq to help clean up the mess from our bombs. Oh, yeah. Perhaps that was a little short-sighted of us. Cue the George W. Bush jokes.
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