Since nothing could top the Season 3 premiere for the "Real Housewives of New Jersey," Bravo went in another direction last night. There were no christening scenes worthy of "The Godfather," no tears or fistfights, but there was plenty of drama. Our favorite New Jersey families are back!
Of course, reality news watchers know that at this point Teresa Giudice is persona non grata with all of her castmates. Now we get to find out how it all plays out. The brunette mom has also been starring on Donald Trump's "Celebrity Apprentice " this season.
In one "Apprentice" moment that particularly stood out, Arsenio Hall is having an epic breakdown about his hatred for cast member Aubrey O'Day and his cousin dying of HIV/AIDS. Teresa remarks that she was terrified. Terrified, Teresa? Really? Of Arsenio Hall? The late night host seems like he wouldn't hurt a fly. You on the other hand have flipped a table and practically assaulted producer Andy Cohen when trying to go after your old nemesis Danielle Staub. Don't get us started.
Anywho, this sure to be memorable "Housewives" season kicked off with the ladies' new taglines. Resident matriarch Caroline Manzo was up first with, "Life is short. I have no time for drama." In an epic burn to the Giudices, sister-in-law Melissa Gorga is second in command with, "I never throw the first punch, but I'm always a knockout." Pow!
Teresa comes in third punctuating the show opening with, "When times get tough, you learn who your real friends are." Then, Ashlee Holmes' long suffering mother Jacqueline Manzo pronounces, "I'm a Vegas girl. I will call your bluff." Our most "Leave It To Beaver" housewife Kathy Wakile gets the party started with, "I'm old school, we believe in respect."
The show took place mostly at the shore, picking up where last season left off. Everyone is still in reaction mode to Teresa's cookbook barbs. In between talking about "ingredientses" [sic] and the wonders of cumin, Tre ripped all of her cast and family to shreds. Remember Tre's "Caroline is about as Italian as the Olive Garden" comment? Yeah, that's where our story jumps off.
All in all, the Gorgas are still gorgeous and hot; Caroline is told that she's beginning menopause; Rosie is more front and center; Tre's kids are still brats; and Joe Giudice is meaner to his wife than ever. Whatever happens next, we'll be watching!
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