The Situation has a brand-new situation on his hands: sobriety.
In his first sit-down interview since completing an in-patient treatment program for a prescription medication addiction, the Jersey Shore star (real name: Mike Sorrentino) tells MTV News that re-entry has been a struggle.
"Ever since I've been out, I'm not gonna lie ... it's not easy," Sorrentino, 29, admits. "But at the same time, where I'm at right now, I'm at a good place. But it took a little bit to get there. In the beginning? A lot of rainy days, so to speak. A lot of rainy days."
The hard-partying star announced March 21 that he had "voluntarily taken steps" to treat his addiction, and checked into the famed Cirque Lodge in Utah. He announced April 5 that he had completed the program and was "stronger than ever."
"Your first day is detox," he told MTV. "It's not a pleasurable experience at all."
His biggest challenge in those first days: "I'd wake up and just be extremely disappointed with myself," he said. "Like, 'I can't believe I got here. How did I get here?'"
"I'm not gonna lie, it feels like you're not gonna recover," he said of the first attempts to get sober. "It feels like an impossible deed ... [but] day-by-day it gets better."
And although Sorrentino admittedly became estranged from his Jersey Shore housemates -- including first-time mom-to-be Snooki -- he says he longs to mend fences.
"She had my back and I had her back too," he said Snooki. "We were close for a long time. ... I am going to say that I am upset that we're not as close as we are today. I care about the girl, for sure."
This article originally appeared on Usmagazine.com: The Situation: Rehab Felt "Impossible" at First