Meta, meta, meta, meta, meta! This week"s episode wants us to know that they are onto us internet freaks who dissect every aspect of a TV show, comic book or movie. We are freaks! Did Aaron Sorkin write this episode? Anyhoo, when a film studio improbably chooses a small town in Kansas with no local film crews to shoot a Warrior Angel movie adaptation, Clark ends up saving the film"s female star, played by the bite-sized but cute Christina Milian, from a car accident on the set. Suddenly, the actress is hitting on Clark, and the tabloids think Clark is dating her. Luckily, Clark has a protective Lana Blue Ball Force Field around him, and the actress believes Clark and Lana belong together. Awww (gag). An online geek who happens to be a production assistant on the movie is trying to kill Christina Milian in order to keep the movie producers from allowing Warrior Angel"s girlfriend to live. Apparently, she dies in the comic book version. Hasn"t this guy ever heard of recasting? Anyway, he tries to swap out blanks for real bullets in a prop gun, but Clark intercepts the bullet. The fanboy sees it and decides that Clark is the real superhero. He tries to kill Lana by dropping her off a building in order to give Clark a kick in the ass to start being a global superhero (awesome idea, by the way), but as we long-timers know, you can never kill Lana. Clark jumps off the roof and somehow saves her in a close-enough approximation of flying. Meanwhile, on what could have been a whole other episode, we find out that Papa Luthor is being held hostage, Misery-style, by a crazy lady with a cabin near the farm. It wasn"t washed away? Papa Luthor manages to escape, but he gets a big shovel to the face from Lana, who has been paying the woman to hold Papa captive. Snooping Lois finds out that a Luthor bought the land near the dam and gets busted by Lex when she tries to sneak in his office for more info. Lex uses what Lois found out to track down Papa Luthor at the cabin, and Lex tries to free him. Papa Luthor kills the crap out of his former captor with his bare hands. Later, Papa Luthor confronts Lana about what happened and suggests that she"s quite the sneaky pinky these days. Lex, a big Warrior Angel fan until his breakup with Clark, tracks down the comic book fan, who ends up in Belle Reve. Lex tries to bribe him with priceless Warrior Angel comics for information about Clark"s abilities, but the fan refuses to talk. Lana blah blahs about not wanting to hold Clark back from his destiny. Clark receives a gift from Christina Milian: a big, obvious red cape. He sticks it on a fence post and goes inside the Kent home to keep leading his incredibly boring life with Lana for the time being.