Titty By Committee
Updated 2005-11-07 16:00:00
Aw, little Clark Kent is growing up! He went to his first strip club, encountered his first set of boobs (remember, Lana's don't count), and even scored a lapdance from the girl who's already living in his house. Sweet maturity! But, I get ahead of myself. Chloe and Lois, hanging out in the basement of The Daily Planet, get a call from a panicked woman seeking a reporter's help. They go, but the woman in the red dress is run over right in front of them. They find out that the girl worked at a strip club and might have been murdered by human traffickers. Before you can say, "Let's stomp Joey in the ratings!," Lois has donned a star-spangled stripper outfit and clear heels to investigate. Oh, Al and Miles. How far down the story ideas list was this episode when you hired Durance? #1? #2? While that's going on, Bo Duke's old buddy (a rapidly decomposing Tom Wopat) comes to visit. He's a state senator who fell in love with the murdered stripper, who was actually killed by a diplomat's son who totally borrows "diplomatic immunity!" from that Lethal Weapon movie. Senator Wopat may not have killed the stripper, but he's married and running against Lex Luthor, who suddenly has ambitions to be a politician, so, dude's gonna lose. Lex and Clark clash over Wopat, who was one of Clark's childhood heroes, but in the end Lex turns out to be pretty noble about the whole thing, not spilling dirt of the senator's shenanigans to the press. Nevertheless, the senator drops out of the race when he realizes he's just a hollow shell of a former TV star...er, I mean "politician," and urges Bo to run against Lex. Chloe gets her first tiny reporter's byline in The Daily Planet, Clark scores his first hetero-wood, and we get about five thousand Dukes Of Hazzard references. I'm sure some other things happened in this episode, but, you know...boobies.