Two and a Half Men Season 3 Episode Guide
Tonight at 09:00 pm CBS (ch 8)
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Weekend in Bangkok With Two Olympic Gymnasts
Episode 1 Originally aired: September 19, 2005When Alan injures himself after falling off the roof, Charlie agrees to take care of Jake for the weekend.
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Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
Episode 2 Originally aired: September 26, 2005Alan enlists Charlies's aid in answering phones at his chiropractic office, a move that turns out to be a bad idea when Charlie turns the office into a brothel.
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Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
Episode 3 Originally aired: October 3, 2005Charlie organizes an intervention to keep Alan from reuniting with Judith.
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Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
Episode 4 Originally aired: October 3, 2005Charlie stages an elaborate intervention to keep Alan and Judith from reuniting when he finds out they've been dating.
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Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs
Episode 5 Originally aired: October 10, 2005Berta moves into Charlie s house for a few days and plays one brother against the other.
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Your Dismissive Attitude Towards Boobs
Episode 6 Originally aired: October 10, 2005Alan allows Berta to stay at Charlie's house on a temporary basis, a move which puts the brothers at odds.
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We Called It Mr. Pinky
Episode 7 Originally aired: October 17, 2005Charlie responds inappropriately to a woman s declaration of love, and Rose says his inability to have a long-lasting relationship is due to unresolved issues with his mother.
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We Called it Mr. Pinky
Episode 8 Originally aired: October 17, 2005A woman declares her love for Charlie only to have him respond inappropriately and Jake seeks Charlie's advice about a girl at school that likes him.
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Hi, Mr. Horned One
Episode 9 Originally aired: October 24, 2005Charlie likes dating Isabella (Jodi Lyn O Keefe), a wild, sexually uninhibited woman, until she threatens to put a curse on his manhood.
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Hi Mr. Horned One
Episode 10 Originally aired: October 24, 2005Charlie is ecstatic about his new wild, sexually uninhibited Goth girlfriend, but Alan is convinced that she's put an evil curse on him.When Charlie is invited to a coven party and sees the effect she is having on him the next morning, he decides to break it off but she proves to be difficult to get rid of without the malevolent intervention of his mother.
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Hi, Mr. Horned One
Episode 11 Originally aired: October 24, 2005A Charlie le gusta salir con Isabella, una mujer sexual, hasta que ella amenaza con ponerle una maldición.
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Sleep Tight, Puddin Pop
Episode 12 Originally aired: November 7, 2005Rose s father (Martin Sheen) confronts Charlie about his intentions toward Rose.
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Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop
Episode 13 Originally aired: November 7, 2005Charlie is confronted by the father of his stalker, Rose, who demands to know Charlie's intentions towards his daughter.
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That Voodoo That I Do Do
Episode 14 Originally aired: November 14, 2005After Charlie is rejected by an attractive ballet teacher, he cons Jake into taking dance lessons to advance his cause.
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Madame and Her Special Friend
Episode 15 Originally aired: November 21, 2005A wealthy, elderly woman vies for Alan's affections.
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Something Salted and Twisted
Episode 16 Originally aired: November 28, 2005Alan organizes a family dinner to celebrate a newspaper article that calls him a ``good doctor, good neighbor and a good guy, but it does not impress his mother.
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Something Salty and Twisted
Episode 17 Originally aired: November 28, 2005Alan organizes a dinner to celebrate a positive newspaper article about him.
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Castration and Scallops
Episode 18 Originally aired: November 28, 2005Charlie tries to help Alan cope with his lifelong need to have the approval of the women in his life.
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Santa s Village of the Damned
Episode 19 Originally aired: December 19, 2005Alan dates a controlling woman who takes over the house during the Christmas holidays.
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Santa's Village of the Damned
Episode 20 Originally aired: December 19, 2005Alan's new girlfriend turns out to be a Martha Stewart-like control freak bent on taking over the house during Christmas.
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That Special Tug
Episode 21 Originally aired: January 9, 2006Alan s emotional breakdown after dropping Jake off for a weekend away sends Charlie to a therapist.
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That Special Tug
Episode 22 Originally aired: January 9, 2006Charlie starts seeing a therapist in order to deal with Alan's emotional insecurities.
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Humiliation Is a Visual Medium
Episode 23 Originally aired: January 23, 2006Charlie must deal with the challenges of a committed relationship that is not based on sex.
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Humiliation is a Visual Medium
Episode 24 Originally aired: January 23, 2006No one believes that Charlie has been in a serious relationship for a month without having sex.
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Love Isn t Blind, It s Retarded
Episode 25 Originally aired: February 6, 2006Charlie plans a romantic date with Mia in the hopes of consummating their relationship; Alan starts dating Charlie s most recent ex-girlfriend.
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Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded
Episode 26 Originally aired: February 6, 2006Charlie plans a romantic evening with Mia in the hopes of consummating their relationship and Alan starts dating a woman half his age.
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My Tongue Is Meat
Episode 27 Originally aired: February 27, 2006When Charlie finds he can no longer handle the healthy lifestyle that Mia has imposed on him, he sneaks cigars, beer and burgers into the garage.
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My Tongue is Meat
Episode 28 Originally aired: February 27, 2006Charlie sneaks beer, cigars and hamburgers when he finds that he can't hack the healthy lifestyle that Mia has imposed on him.
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Ergo, the Booty Call
Episode 29 Originally aired: March 6, 2006Alan tries to avoid bringing his sexy 22-year-old girlfriend to Jake s birthday party.
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Ergo, the Booty Call
Episode 30 Originally aired: March 6, 2006Alan tries to avoid bringing his 22 year-old girlfriend to Jake's birthday party.
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The Unfortunate Little Schnauser
Episode 31 Originally aired: March 13, 2006Charlie boycotts an advertising banquet where he is up for an award due to the fact that he keeps losing to his nemesis, Archie.
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The Spit-Covered Cobbler
Episode 32 Originally aired: March 20, 2006Paying his young girlfriend s bills financially straps Alan.
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The Spit-Covered Cobbler
Episode 33 Originally aired: March 20, 2006Alan is in financial dispair because of taking on his girlfriend's bills and Charlie makes up a lie to Judith for him when he can't make his alimony payment on time.
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Golly Moses, She s a Muffin
Episode 34 Originally aired: April 10, 2006Kandi moves in with Alan, causing tension in the house since Charlie is having a dry spell with women.
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Golly Moses, She's a Muffin
Episode 35 Originally aired: April 10, 2006Charlie discovers he has a new roommate, that Kandi has been living with Alan which creates lots of tension in the house. To make matters worst Charlie has been having a dry spell with women.
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Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro
Episode 36 Originally aired: April 24, 2006Kandi, Alan's hot young girlfriend leaves him and goes to stay with his ex-wife Judith, Alan tries to win her back but Judith has turned her against him.
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And the Plot Moistens
Episode 37 Originally aired: May 1, 2006Lacking the stimulation of an intelligent conversation, Alan finds more in common with Jake's teacher than Kandi. His efforts to not lead her on prove complicated though as Charlie entertains himself by compounding the situation for Alan.
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Just Once With Aunt Sophie
Episode 38 Originally aired: May 8, 2006Jake gets invited to his first boy-girl party and needs Charlie's wisdom on hooking up with the chicks. Allen feels shorted, not just that this should be a father-son bonding moment but also that Charlie never gave him the same advice. He is glad that Jake got such expert advice though, especially when it pays off for Jake.
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Arguments for a Quickie
Episode 39 Originally aired: May 15, 2006When Charlie finds out that Mia is in town with her dance troupe and has invited him to her performance, he opts not to go and tries to convince Alan (and himself) that he's over her. After surprising Alan (and himself) by showing up, Charlie gets another surprise when Mia explains that she wants something personal from him -- his sperm. Shockingly, commitment-phobic Charlie finds he's not up to the task of a donor and fe…more
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That Pistol-Packin Hermaprodite
Episode 40 Originally aired: May 22, 2006Charlie and Mia plan their wedding despite complications on both sides of the family.
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That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite
Episode 41 Originally aired: May 22, 2006Happily ever after, or not. Charlie and Mia's big day is finally here but when the families meet things immediately start to go down-hill. Rose takes the news of the engagement hard, and makes some interesting plans of her own. Additionally, there are questions as to where Alan and Jake will live after Charlie and Mia get married. Ultimately, Charlie and his bride-to-be end up deciding on a small ceremony in Vegas, where …more
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