Pretty Sad Woman
Updated 2007-02-03 16:00:00
Okay, first she's a girl at Comic-Con. Then she's a hooker. Then she's a hooker with a heart of gold. Then she's a scamming hooker with a heart of pyrite. Then she's a hooker with a heart of gold again. Then she's a pole dancer. I swear, this plot switched back on itself so many times I didn't know which end was up. I comforted myself with the thought that hookers probably have the same problem. So, Max comes to Veronica with a request to find a Geekette he met at Comic-Con, but it turns out that she was just a hooker his roommates hired and coached to be the Geekette of his dreams. No matter: Max still wants her found, so after slogging through all the Battlestar Galactica references, Veronica finds her. They're in love -- real love it would appear -- all over Logan's couch until one of hooker Chelsea/Wendy/Fiona's sister-hookers shows up all bruised and whiny. Cheliondy needs to come back to the hooker fold to keep the bruising and whininess at bay. God, long story short: Veronica discovers that the bruising was fake, but in the end, Cheliondy does have a heart of gold, and Max pays $10,000 to get her out of hooker hock. They're happy for all of five minutes until Max is faced with the reality of Cheliondy's past, which...he already knew? But now he can't seem to stomach it? They split, and Cheliondy goes back to a previous pole-dancing gig. Meanwhile, Keith is sort of making headway on Dean Ed Begley's murder by dressing up and going bad cop on the Lillith Triumverate. He manages to squeeze out an admission that they egged the Dean's office the night he was killed, and gets Nish to own up to egging the Dean's Volvo. The thing is, the Dean wasn't driving the Volvo that night, but his wife was. In Love Bird news, Veronica and Logan are barely back together before Veronica starts asking searching questions that every healthy couple should discuss: "Have you ever been with a hooker?" "Were you with anyone in Mexico that night Mercer raped someone?" "Did you hook up with anyone when we were separated?" Logan answers "no" to the first two but cops to one assignation he feels gross about. Veronica gets over this brief disturbance in the Logan Force, but is back to being in the throes of the Dark Side when Madison pops up to tell her that she and Logan hooked up in Aspen over the holidays. Why Veronica suddenly decides look upon Madison as a bastion of truthiness will have to remain a mystery to me until next week.