Daytime

If You Don’t Know What I Mean, Ask A 14-Year-Old

Daytime in No Time

"Today": Aww, how come England gets giant Chia Pet sculptures of the Queen and Prince Philip as a royal tribute, and we're stuck licking old presidents' faces on regular ol' postage stamps? Are we too ch-ch-ch-cheap? Sigh... I guess the Chia Pet grass is always greener on the other side!

"Access Hollywood Live": This will probably be the last time anyone brings celebrity memorabilia by this show to generate buzz for an auction. Unless of course you're interested in buying a dress once worn by Madonna and later worn by Kit Hoover. Or a pair of Liberace's pants used and abused by one Billy Bush! At least they didn't get makeup all over the inside of one of Madonna's hats after passing it around, oh wait yeah they did.


"GMA": When Robin Roberts got a free gift of some Peeta Melark "Hunger Games" pillowcases (if you don't know what I mean, ask a 14-year-old), she admitted that back in the day, she rocked a set of "Star Wars" sheets on her bed as a kid. Me? I could never decide, so I rotated --- Strawberry Shortcake one night, Rainbow Brite the next. And on laundry day? The "Small Wonder" bedspread (I think we got that one on clearance!)

"GDNY": It's really no surprise that Pauly Shore is kinda creepy, and seeing him in full-on creeper mode on my TV definitely made me uncomfortable. Does he know that Lala is married to a six foot eight basketball player and just not care? Or does he like getting whooped on for creeping out the ladies? Because if that's the case, he's in luck!

"Wake Up with Al": Rod Blagojevich has pretty much zero redeeming qualities, although some could make an argument for his amazing hair. And while I don't know much about politics or why he's in prison, I do know that its not easy to have a glorious head of hair so I'm a little sad that he won't get to maintain it while serving time. Then again who really cares? He's got bigger problems to worry about, like that inmate named Bubba down the hall!

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