I Had It Translated Back To English!

"The View": I understand Barbara's gripes about "The Bachelor" for the most part, but if we didn't have it there are so many things we would be missing out on! Like watching people go on epic dates that nobody could ever afford. Or seeing glorious rising camera shots over beautiful mountain landscapes via helicopter. Or those gorgeous diamond rings that are donated by jewelers for advertising purposes. Or watching two people awkwardly tell each other that they'll love one another forever when you know it's not true! So come on B, what we would do without all those things?!

"Live! with Kelly" Wow, Elle Macpherson sure is looking good! I mean, that's not news, but I guess I realized I hadn't kept tabs on her in a while. (Okay, I admit, my super old producers and writers made me make that joke. Apparently, Elle Macpherson used to do commercials for "TAB", which was some kind of diet soda they served in a time called the "80s". Whoa, they had soda way back then?

"Today": In honor of Senor Will Ferrell and his bilingual film, "Casa de mi Padre" I wrote this entire blog in Spanish. But because most of you probably can't read in Spanish, I had it translated back to English before I posted it. ¡You're welcome!

"GMA": Awww, if watching Kermit and Miss Piggy sing "The Rainbow Connection" to close out today's show doesn't give you Tuesday Morning goosebumps, then I'm not sure I can help you. But don't worry, someday you'll find it.

Watch "Daytime in No Time" right now and e-mail me at daytimeinnotime@yahoo.com!

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