Santa’s On Line 2

"The View": It was nice to see a couple of the guys from "A Christmas Story" but I'm wondering where some of the other characters were. Perhaps Ralphie thought Joy Behar looked too much Santa Claus and he got stage fright. And Ralphie's brother Randy might have been stuck in a pile snow after being knocked over. And I'm thinking Ralphie's mom was busy battling a gang of hounds while his dad was in a basement somewhere entrenched in battle with a furnace. Either way I'm just glad the interview went off without a hitch and nobody had to get their mouths washed out with soap, gross!

"Today": Kathie Lee and Hoda used none other than jolly Kris Kringle to deliver all the bad news at the top of their hour this morning. They would share some depressing news and then Santa would "hohoho" the happiness back into the show. I think this is a great idea but it is one of those things that only works on tv. Like if a doctor walked in with my test results and Santa, or my boyfriend showed up on a date with Santa, or my tax accountant conference called me with Santa on line 2... I'm pretty sure I would just start freaking out

"Wake Up with Al": If I saw a police officer dancing in the street, I wouldn't know whether to get out of my car and join in or speed through the intersection as fast as possible to get away from it! Traffic that day must have been really stop and go-go!

"Live! With Kelly": I can't believe Kelly's producer wouldn't give today's trivia caller a break. She had a trip to the Carribean on the line, and a really tough question - to name what may be both Scarlett Johansson and Woody Allen's worst movie - and she got it almost totally right! ("Match Point", "Match-up"... what's the big diff?) After an emotional holiday appeal from Kelly, complete with soulful Hanukah songs, some say, the Gelman's heart almost grew three sizes that day. But then he just shrugged and said "Sorr-ry!" and gave her a gift basket of spa products instead. Maybe he should save some spa stuff for himself, to exfoliate all that Grinch-y green skin!

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