(Television Without Pity) — This season, people who nearly died on "Survivor" in the past received a chance to return and play against other mortals who have an unproven safety record. How will the returnees fare against the new kids? We've got our predictions.
Stats: 32-year-old business student from Los Angeles, California
First impression: This Brazilian showed up wearing a ridiculous flowy dress that offered no protection and says she's not above flirting to get ahead in the game. We're not surprised.
Odds of winning: 30 to 1. Flirting? That's so six seasons ago.
Stats: 20-year-old model/student from Provo, Utah
First impression: She was ticked that Russell gave her puzzles to do when she said that she was better at physical challenges, so she's likely gunning for him, and she's got Malcolm on her side.
Odds of winning: 12 to 1. We sense that she's got an angry side, and when it comes to the surface, her real game will start.
Stats: 53-year-old computer engineer from Terry Town, Louisiana
First impression: He seems to be the one most worried about Skupin's clumsy behavior and might end up being the caretaker of this team, but he has done little to stand out so far.
Odds of winning:20 to 1. We don't know enough after the premiere to judge, but he's done nothing to tick us off. He's a solid middle-of-the-road player.
Stats: 24-year-old track coach from Shawnee, Kansas
First impression: He can paddle a boat. That's pretty much all we learned about him, as he silently behaved like a worker bee for the entire episode and barely uttered a word.
Odds of winning: 17 to 1. Hard to say, but laying back doesn't usually help people on this show.
Stats: 32-year-old cosmetologist from Winston-Salem, North Carolina
First impression: She's got a funky look, with tattoos and spiky hair, but says she's strong because she grew up in a trailer park beating up boys. While she tries to bond with Jeff about being Southern, she doesn't seem to understand the way this game works.
Odds of winning: 40 to 1. Being strong isn't enough; she needs to actually play the game, and she does not get that.
Stats: 41-year-old sex therapist from Cedar Rapids, Iowa
First impression: She seemed keen on making Zane her pet project, but now that he's gone, it's good that she also has an alliance with Malcolm. But her habit of asking a lot of personal questions might get on people's nerves.
Odds of winning: 15 to 1. She seems strong and has a good sense of people, but she might be a pain. Time will tell with this one.
Stats: 44-year-old retired Major League baseball player from Austin, Texas
First impression: We already hate the former baseball player, who is trying to hide his identity so people won't know he's loaded but talks about his motocross hobby and his ranch like people won't pick up on the fact that he's rich. And he's like WebMD over there, diagnosing the knee he twisted falling off the boat in the premiere. We advise getting a real opinion.
Odds of winning: 8 to 1. If he plays the "take me to the end because I'm rich and they won't give me the money" card, he could succeed.
Stats: 50-year-old writer from Los Angeles, California
First impression: This is technically the third impression, since he's already been on "Survivor: Cook Islands" and "Survivor: Micronesia." And we didn't really like him either time, though in "Micronesia," he was plucked from the game because of an infection before we could muster a lot of hate. Here he's already gaming, searching for the immunity idol from the get-go and not making many friends in the process. He nearly threw Jeff overboard with the supplies.
Odds of winning: 60 to 1. His obnoxious attitude didn't get him to the finals the first time, and he's not exactly winning friends and influencing people in the Philippines.
Stats: 22-year-old former Miss Delaware from Newark, Delaware
First impression: This sweet young pageant girl is very naive and thinks that her whole tribe is like a family… except for Jonathan.
Odds of winning: 75 to 1. Someone who thinks this show is about making friends is definitely not cut out to win.
Stats: 49-year-old former teen star from Dallas, Texas
First impression: Blair Warner! OK, not that anyone in her tribe actually knows who that is, but we're mostly excited about this season because this former "Facts of Life" star played one of the most snooty characters on TV. She claims to be a superfan and even made an effort to learn how to make fire before she went on the show, and she has the intelligence to solve puzzles. She purposely didn't tell anyone that she was famous in the premiere, but she could probably garner some sympathy if she told them how she lost all her money in the stock market. She might even get RC to give her advice postmerge.
Odds of winning: 80 to 1. She may have skills, but she's got no social game whatsoever. You take the good, you take the bad … those are the facts of life.
Stats: 25-year-old bartender from Hermosa Beach, California
First impression: He lived in Micronesia for a year teaching ESL to little kids. He knows how to make fire, but he's smart enough not to take all the credit for it.
Odds of winning: 2 to 1. His preexisting survival skills could come into play here, and he's got the charm to win people over. He's our favorite to win this whole thing.
Stats: 50-year-old professional speaker from White Lake, Michigan
First impression: He's the dude who fell into the fire and severely burned his hands on "Survivor: The Australian Outback." It was one of the most shocking moments in reality TV to that point, but clearly the guy hasn't learned his lesson. He already has a cut on his foot, his hand, and his head because he's insanely dangerous with a machete. Someone needs to Skupin-proof their hut. He's also clearly taking the commanding role and joining the "young" alliance while trying to tell Lisa how she should be playing her game.
Odds of winning: 10 to 1. He's the strongest of the returning players by far, and he could win … if he doesn't get airlifted out before that happens.
Stats: 24-year-old engineering graduate from Holmdel, New Jersey
First impression: He's strong and keeps his mouth shut but thinks that he could partner up with Abi (because she obviously finds him hot) and then manipulate that alliance in his favor in the future. Like RC's gonna let that happen.
Odds of winning: 13 to 1. He's got a shot, but there's some tough competition.
Roberta "RC" Saint-Armour
Stats: 27-year-old investment banker from New York, New York
First impression: This really annoying girl is playing straight out of the gate, lying about her occupation (when she doesn't really need to) and making an alliance with Skupin, Pete, and Abi so she doesn't have to deal with old lady Lisa. And we hate her talk about how she's so tough because she works on Wall Street in high heels.
Odds of winning: 4 to 1. She's on our nerves, but she's a commanding force on the island, and we're guessing she'll push her way far in this game.
Stats: 45-year-old environmental attorney from Glenside, Pennsylvania
First impression: Did we feel bad for the guy when we thought he was dead in the middle of the jungle after playing some stupid maze challenge in "Survivor: Samoa"? Yeah. But we're not really glad to have him back, as he's a stubborn and forceful player, which is what nearly got him killed the first time around. This time he says he's not going to be a leader and that he's going to foist that title on to some unsuspecting sap … but his actions prove that he's the actual unsuspecting sap in this scenario. You'd think he'd have learned from his previous mistakes.
Odds of winning: 100 to 1. He's already on his way out the door. Only an immunity idol will keep him alive for a few extra episodes.
Stats: 28-year-old insurance saleswoman from Silver Spring, Maryland
First impression: She goes just by her last name, which would irritate us except that she seems like a somewhat savvy player. She instantly recognizes Jeff Kent, because an old boyfriend was really into baseball, but instead of confronting him or blurting it out to the tribe, she's holding that valuable nugget of information close to the vest until it becomes useful to her situation. Yeah, we like her.
Odds of winning: 6 to 1. She's strong and smart, and she's our personal favorite. She just needs to make a strong alliance to go far.
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