A poem for Desiree: Roses are red, violets are blue, you love Brooks, and he doesn't love you … uh, yet.
In a bit of an unusual move for the star of "The Bachelorette," Des actually admits to Chris Harrison that she's fallen in love with Brooks. Or, excuse us, she's at "the finish line" with him.
Now, does this mean the show is over? No, since he hasn't said those magical three words to her. (She hasn't said them to him either, but we're pretty sure that's not allowed by the producers at this point.) And Des doesn't seem like she's going to choose someone who doesn't declare his undying love — and get on one knee.
So, the other guys are still in the running, especially since a couple of them have confessed their feelings. In the race for Desiree's heart, Brooks may have the lead, but he could wipe out at the next sharp turn.
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
Des and the guys are staying on Madeira Island, Portugal, off the coast of Africa. She's still a little down from the whole James incident, so her three besties fly over for some girl talk.
Those three ladies just happen to be from her season of "The Bachelor" — Lesley, Jackie, and Catherine (yeah, the woman who won Sean Lowe's heart over Des … awkward!). They spy on the guys at the pool, giggle over their physical assets, and grill Des about her feelings for each man.
After her fun afternoon with the ladies, Des heads out for her one-on-one with Brooks. They haven't had a private date since the very first one. But it's clear they're smitten with each other. They drive up a mountain to have a picnic in the clouds and even get silly "making up" words to describe feelings between like and love. We put "making up" in quotes because the words are actually just regular old words — stepping, skipping, running, and the finish line.
Later that night, Des tells him that she's at the running stage. Awww … oh wait, in a confessional, Brooks admits that he's not quite there yet. Oh no.
Still, he does like her a lot (so, he's skipping?) and wants her to meet his family. Somehow, we have a feeling that he'll get one of those hometown dates.
The second one-on-one date of the week is with Chris. Look, we don't need to be objective here — we are Team Chris. He and Des clearly have great physical chemistry (aka they want to make out with each other like crazy). And his habit of writing poetry is a bit cheesy but still sweet.
They take a yacht to a private island, where he surprises her with a message in a bottle. But the paper is blank — Chris wants them to write a poem together. They write the cheesiest verse ever in human history and throw the bottle into the sea.
At dinner, Chris is trying to work up the nerve to tell her how he feels. The poor guy starts sweating, fidgeting, tapping his feet. Finally, he stutters out that he's written (another) poem. The last line reveals his love for her. Des looks blown away and teary-eyed at this declaration.
She's falling for him and can picture being married to him. So can he. "When do we finally get to spend the rest of our lives together?" he asks in his talking head. "I think I found the one."
Totally Team Chris.
The last one-on-one date of the week goes to Michael. Finally! The guy's been waiting all season for this. Des takes him on one of those "let's pretend we're a normal couple and go shopping together" excursions. They have fun sampling fruits and trying on accessories before going on a toboggan ride on the streets of Madeira.
At dinner (apparently set up in the middle of the road?), Michael gushes about how amazing and awesome the day was. Des smiles and gives a little "awww" but seems a bit aloof. She's not starry-eyed or affectionate like she was with Brooks and Chris. When he goes on about a bad breakup and how he's ready to love again, all she can say is that he's a "great guy."
Oofa. We have a feeling Michael is decidedly in the friend zone.
Fast and Furious
On the final date of the week, a two-on-one with Zak and Drew, Des takes the guys to a racetrack to drive go-carts. She smokes them in the first race, then pits them against each other. Zak takes the early lead and cruises to victory, so she rewards him by taking him away for alone time.
Seems the guy really did pay attention in that drawing class in Barcelona, because he presents her with a sketchbook recapping their time together — from his shirtless arrival on the first night to their kiss at the ice hotel in Munich. Zak is in love with Des but has only known her for a few weeks, so he wants to hold off. Plus, it'd be totally rude to drop an ILY bomb while Drew's waiting around the corner.
Well, Drew doesn't follow Zak's rules during his own alone time with Des. He excitedly describes how much his family is going to love Desiree if she comes to his hometown and tenderly tells her that he feels he's known her for his entire life. He's fallen in love with her.
Des looks extremely happy about this, and when they go back to rejoin Zak, she gives the rose to Drew. Zak is crestfallen.
That'll teach him to play Mr. Nice Guy.
No cocktail parties anymore, so Chris Harrison takes Des aside for a little chat. He notes that Drew is the only guy who's safe with a rose, and she calls him the best-looking guy she's ever met. Then Chris brings up Brooks, and Des blushes, smiles, and giggles like she's still a teenager.
Desiree says she's at "the finish line" with her feelings for Brooks — she's in love with him! Chris is happy for her and asks the question in our minds: Is the show over?
No, not yet. Des is a bit scared of her feelings. After all, Brooks hasn't declared himself yet. And she's also in the process of falling in love with Chris. So, this will not be the final rose ceremony. Des is proceeding with her visits to four hometowns.
The rose ceremony commences. Drew's got his rose. Desiree then hands out roses to Brooks, Chris, and Zak.
That means Michael is going home to Florida.
Des walks him out, wanting to explain her decision. She doesn't do it well — there's a lot of stammering and sighing. Michael was ready to commit, ready to make her happy for the rest of her life. Desiree's face falls at that comment. It gets worse when he tells her she's ruined him for future dates.
"No girl is going to be able to match up to you, quite frankly," he says before getting into the waiting car.
As the car drives away, Michael calls his mom. "Here we go again," his mom says.
"If she didn't love you as much as you loved her, it's not meant to be," she tells him.
Wise words, Michael's mom. Very wise words.
Breakups are hard to watch on the Bachelorette. Des has really wonderful guys left, but was tough to see Michael not get rose #bachelorette— Luke H! (@CoolLukeHH) July 9, 2013
I just want some dude on the #bachelorette to be like, "In love?! I met you six weeks ago and you've made out with 30 guys since then."— Chris Lee (@thejivemachine) July 9, 2013
So des is at the finish line (in love) with brooks and brooks is still jogging (like half in love) with des. Ugh So confusing #bachelorette— KATIEEE (@KatieeeeJamess) July 9, 2013
Watch the full episode:
"The Bachelorette" airs Mondays at 8 PM on ABC.
- Chris Harrison